If your girl is a total sports nut, I suggest you suck it up and propose now. Otherwise, I have a few suggestions for you to help balance sports and date time.

I took the lady out for dinner and drinks the other day. We decided to hit up the local wing joint and burn our tongues on a little buffalo sauce, then quench that burning fire with a frosty mug of suds. I totally spaced on the timing, and it turns out there was a college football game on. Needless to say, my eyes wandered a few times, and I was busted. And guys, just a hint, if you're ever in this situation: I don't recommend explaining yourself by saying, "I was just checking out that hottie." It turns out, that's even worse. Who knew?!

So then, what are we to do? Here are a few ideas.

• Take her to lunch during the week. She'll love that special, unexpected break from work. And unless you're a Cubs fan (and I'm sorry if you are, better luck next millennium), you should be in the clear. Oh, but beware March Madness.
• Check the schedule. Maybe there's a slow week for your team. You can score extra points by taking her out on game night. Subtly drop a hint that missing the game is a small price to pay to be with her.
• Take her to a game. If she agrees to go, she can hardly complain that you're watching the game. And who knows -- maybe you'll make a convert.

Here are a couple other helpful nuggets to remember.

• No, you are not that sly. Stooping to fake-tie your shoe while you check the scores will get you caught every time.
• Don't believe what you see on TV. It is not a good idea to check ESPN on your phone. Again, she is not fooled into thinking you are sending a picture message of your new puppy to your mom.
• If you can pull it off, go on a double date, preferably with a bigger sports nut than yourself. You'll come off as the reasonable one, and she'll lower her expectations of you on dates. Pretty soon, you'll be eating ribs with no shame about the BBQ sauce covering your face.

So I just got back from Vegas. It had been a while since my last adventure into Sin City, and boy how I had forgotten. Apparently, there is something in the air there that causes girls to wear about 25% of their normal clothing, and I'm not just talking about the ones who are paid to do so. Hostesses, waitresses, bachelorettes … Hell, I think I saw a nun sporting a bikini to the bar. Not only that, but whatever is in the air also seems to dilute the effects of alcohol, making it possible for a 110-pound lady to drink a pitcher of beer and five shots in an hour -- which, unsurprisingly, leads to some pretty crazy dancing.

But I digress. I behaved, mostly, so I've got nothing to hide, and yet still I ask myself: "Self … how much should I tell me lady?"

The way I see it, trust is what its all about. I could tell her it was a quiet couple of days at the slot machines and go on and on about how nice the 80-year-old lady from Minnesota I met was, but she'd know that was a lie. So I pretty much spilled the beans. After all, I had to tell someone what I saw. A couple of my favorites include:

• The hostess at the restaurant in the Venetian who forgot the bottom half of her dress. Hostess!!
• The guy outside the Paris with the "Girls at your door in 20 minutes" T-shirt. At least he's discrete.
• The cocktail waitress with more on her head than her body. I guess birds count as clothing now?

The good news, guys, is that she thought it was funny and totally appreciated my openness. I see a couple potential wins here. First, she immediately got over her concerns about what I might have done, so she's much more likely to support my endeavors in the future. Second, she's likely to reciprocate, so I have less to worry about on her girls trips to New York. So like I say, the truth works.

Now, that said, let me remind you that I did nothing worse than some "sightseeing" and bad dancing. If you come home with a stripper's name tattooed across your back, you might want to have it removed and try not to giggle whenever she says she wants a "Mercedes."

The conventional online dating wisdom for profiles is to be yourself, use pictures that aren't from 5 years back when you looked like a totally different person and describe who you are openly and honestly. But everything your grandma told you is B.S., according to a new online dating study by OkCupid’s OkTrends blog, which found that there are a few key things you can do to up the number of cheesy "They're Interested!" emails flooding your inbox.

1. No LOLspeak -- Act like you graduated high school for 5 seconds and purge your profile of references to "u," "yer" and other phrases that indicate you spend all day surfing sites written for 13-year-olds. Also, egregious spelling errors are right out.
2. No Compliments -- Or at least no praising physical attributes right off the bat. It gives the impression you're only looking for one thing. Try commending a quick wit or an impressive accomplishment first.
3. Be Quirky -- There are literally millions of singles online, and you should pretend like every one of them is interested in the same person you are. Originality, even in something as simple as a greeting, gets you remembered.
4. Slow Down -- Make it clear that you're comfortable chatting via the anonymous dating site for awhile before begging for a first meeting. People who seem like they're jumping the gun get major points off.
5. Cite Specific Interests and Hobbies -- Again, originality (even bordering on weirdness) is key. Talk about you obsession with Shark Week, debate the merits of different brands of hand sanitizer or tell that one story that always clears the room. You'll definitely stand out, and maybe you'll find someone who knows more about the elasmobranch than you do!